“How long are you going to tolerate this?” Semirah asked marveled at how much I must have been suffering.
I sighed, shaking my head. “I don’t know o.”
It’s amazing how one desperately sought company, a break or even a way out in one’s matrimonial home. When I saw Semirah park her car, I madly dashed for her, with tears coursing down my face. There was concern on her beautiful face and she did the right thing of pulling me together. She wiped tears of her face too and then I knew that it was either I truly did look pathetic or Semirah had gone soft. Ever since the night I tried to successfully talk to Etim, his mother became two different persons. She became irritatingly nice in Etim’s presence and got disgusted at me just as Etim shut the door on his way out to work.
Sometimes, she’d launch into some malicious songs of some Aunty alaapa ike or iyawo olorun rubber she knew who had no bones to do any chores; besides being completely responsible for getting up early, cooking for the home and taking care of the house. She even danced in tune to the songs whenever I walked into wherever she was.
And they said this woman went to school! Held a Masters degree! Sad!
Sometimes I didn’t understand the weight of the songs but I could understand how vile they were especially when she shook her massive hips to whichever side of her I was and then eyed me at intervals.
We met MIL in the living room and Semirah went all the way down.
“Omo oluaabi bawo ni?” Responsible child, how are you? How are you doing today and how are your parents?”
“We are all fine thank you ma, hope you’re enjoying your stay?”
“Oh, I’m fine o; my son is trying his best.”
“That’s very good.” Semirah said smiling.
I was having the time of my life in the kitchen as Semirah was preparing lunch. She banned me from lifting anything and took absolute control of my kitchen. She kept feeding me bits and pieces of meat, fish and all of the other edible ingredients. MIL came in, hissed, sighed and whispered to herself and I was shocked when Semirah was smiling.
“Ma, would you need anything? Is there something I can help you get Ma?”
“Nothing o my dear, and you, why would you allow a visitor do things you’re supposed to be doing?”
“Haba Mama, you can’t be around, all the way from Nigeria, and not have the opportunity of tasting my cooking.”
MIL flashed that smile I was expecting and boldly written on the look she sent past me was `Here is a well-trained woman.’ I got the message.
“It will be just in a few minutes. I’m sorry we are running a bit late.”
I got the look again from MIL and she smiled, patting Semirah on the back.
Seriously?
Semirah smiled, nodding her head and I fought the urge to ask her what image she was trying to create. But we both just moved on to talking about friends and our future.
MIL was in the living room watching her usual home videos when Semirah pushed me gently in, and dropped me in the chair, she dragged the soft stool and placed my legs on it before she brought my tray of food and placed it on my legs. I saw MIL’s eyes light up in mild fury at the shift of attention. All this while, Semirah was smiling and I had to admit I was beginning to get scared of the clear mischief on her face. I was relieved when she served MIL, because knowing Semirah, she may not give the woman food even after perceiving the aroma. Then she sat opposite me, on the floor, lotus position and we ate, in silence before my phone rang. My eyes lit up.
“It’s Subomi.” You remember her? My cousin who took Bundo’s place? “Oh, I forget to tell you she was getting married.”
“Hello Amariya.” Semirah oozed in between her mouthful, I smiled. I then put the phone on speaker and we all just kept chatting. I just lit up from the inside as we all wanted to speak at the same time. MIL was starting to get a bit uncomfortable with our noise but because of Semirah’s presence and her food she was ravenously eating, she just increased the volume from the control.
“I’ve missed you girls so badly and I have told Wale to come and dobale for you girls specially.”
We all laughed. “Tell him we are waiting o. And that our own group of friends receive gifts from the groom o” Semirah pressed. We laughed.
“So how far with the arrangements, I hope you have people supporting you and all.” I asked, Subomi being her parent’s only child.
“Well it is okay; my mother in law has been able to…?”
“Your what?” Semirah screamed like some evil spirits just possessed her. Don’t you guys ever listen?” Her voice was harsh. She looked straight, not one a hint of smile on her face. From me and Subomi’s silence, we knew it was lecture time.
“I told you girls to always aim for men without mothers! It’s always better when your mother-in-law is dead!” She shrieked.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen my MIL look that appalled before all my life. Her eyes snapped away from the television to Semirah, with some terrible looks to kill. Semirah was not bothered one bit as she kept berating Subomi.
“I don’t know why you people foresee trouble and just chose to chuk your head there. What’s so hard about getting a guy who doesn’t have a mother? E better make the mama don already die! MIL dropped her cutlery, finally shut her mouth and got up; only that she didn’t go in. Just like I thought, she did exactly what I expected of her. She rushed for ………
AmOy
Photo by Amebor
Pearls & Oysters 